"Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves."
-James Matthew Barrie

The Last Five Days:

Road trip with three of my favorite girls

My first In-N-Out Burger

My first trip to Vegas

My first trip to California

My first ocean

Sending a best friend into the MTC

Finishing spring semester

Smashed between two of my favorite people

"The happiest moments my heart knows are those in which it is pouring forth its affections to a few esteemed characters" -Thomas Jefferson

 I'm going into this post with an empty brain.  My thoughts are jumbled and I can't seem to organize them, so bare with me, dear readers.  I will be on the West Coast a week from now.  I will be in Texas (on the south coast?) two weeks from now.  Someday I would love to go back to the East Coast and explore more than NYC.  Someday soon, I hope. 

 I was feeling pangs of sadness about leaving Provo, UT for over a month and about turning 20 one month from today, but those are far from me now.  I feel completely liberated.  I have another week and a half of hard school, and no matter how bad or well it goes, it will be over in a week and a half.  I don't mind if I'm not hanging out with someone at every chance of social interaction, after all, I won't be here in two weeks to feel the pressure of missing out.  No dating pressure, I have no more weekends here until August so what would be the use? I will be with my family, I will be with my parents, the people who love me the most, even on days when my hair is frizzy and my eyes are baggy and I am not in the smiling, baking, happy Breanna mood.  Although I will try to be in that mood for them most of the summer.

Checklist for my summer:

_  Get enough sleep.

_  Spend lots of quality time with sister.

_  Beat little brother at ANY video game. Once.

_  Have an inspiring/life analyzing conversation with Dad.

_  Learn to cook REAL food by helping my mom in the kitchen.

_  Get TAN. And learn to jump better on wakeboard.

_  Become best EFY counselor possible.

_  Go running with puppy and get fit.

_  Find missionary opportunities and continue to grow.

_ Turn 20.

20. I'm going to be fully torn from my teenager identity. When people learn of my age, they won't react like I was born yesterday, I won't get teased as so many of my friends love to do to me now.  People will take me more seriously.  It's weird here in Provo. 20 and 19 are not much different, but apparently taking the "teen" syllable out of your life makes you a bigger prospect for maturity and dating.  A part of me is hanging dearly onto that "teen" word as an excuse to be obnoxiously loud and silly at times, as an excuse to still feel like the child version of myself. But, much like everyone else in this world, once I've lived for 20 years, I have to start claiming it. It's been the best 20 years of my life. Ok but seriously, it has been a seriously blessed 20 years.

Well, I'm done with Provo for now and I'm so happy about it.  I'm ready for a break from this four-walled apartment complex.  I need to see fields and forests and lakes.  I need to meet new people. And I need to know when you are throwing me my birthday party.

Breanna's Words of Wisdom: Step back. Is it really THAT important? 

Freedom.

Wow. What a glorious life I live.  This weekend was visionary.  No, nothing extraordinary happened, it was just simple. Simple divinity.  As I noted in my last post, most of my friends are out of town this weekend.  But not all of them.  Dear Katie and Brooke and Ian, you rock. Yesterday I started my day at the library with my English group, working hard for three hours on our 15 page research paper. We were successful.  I walked out earlier than expected to greet the heat and the shadows of heavy clouds.  I watched half an indie film before receiving a call from the one and only Brooke Beecher.  And the fun began.  And by fun, I mean calm, lazy excitement.  After watching multiple episodes of Arrested Development (a show I have never been involved in, although I found it pretty hilarious yesterday), Katie, Brooke, Ian and I decided our bodies needed nourishing.  And what better way to do so than to feed them exceptionally over-priced Italiano?  We set off to Gloria's Little Italy, to experience a little tortellini and a little lasagna.  We watched the movie Stardust afterwards to let ourselves digest. I must say I felt the adventurous and hopelessly romantic side of me at the end of Tristan's journey.

Bike ride. To campus. Best part of my day.  Although I was borrowing a kid-sized bike that was missing the ends of its handlebars, I was able to keep up with my bicycle gang.  We biked all around campus, through the sprinkling rain, and down the hill back to the Enclave.  While on campus, I came across a HUGE deer.  It just looked at me and eventually hid behind a bush as I got closer and closer.  We were going to become really great friends until Katie so lovingly said "Breanna, do you think you are Snow White or something?" Then I realized I was probably tormenting the deer more than befriending it. Darn.  I always wished Dr. Dolittle was a true story.  While the clouds continually threatened to open and pour down on us, I paused to breathe in that its-about-to-rain smell and the smell of the trees.  It was lovely.  This earth is beautiful.

Finally, we went swimming. For nearly three hours.  It rained as we played football and keep away in the pool with 12 others.  And how else to end the day but with a piece of cake and a conversation with friends? I would go on to tell you how wonderful today has been as well, but that might be overwhelming for my friends of the sarcastic nature.  I know this post is incredibly happy and content and lovey and cliche, but I do not see one thing wrong with that.

Friends, count your many blessings. Name them one by one. Throw your cares away for a weekend and feel the sun (or rain) on your face.  It is worth it to live, to really live.